Unless you’re a monk who’s taken a vow of silence, you’ve experienced the damaging power of the tongue. The old adage that sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me is only true if you’re talking about physical pain. Even if you have the skin of a rhino and are able to bear up under any verbal abuse and insults, you can still be hurt by gossip and slander.
Every day, relationships are destroyed, churches are split and people’s careers are held back by unfettered tongues wagging about something they shouldn’t. The Bible is filled with advice about taming the tongue. Let’s look at a few different passages and talk about what God’s Word has to say about dealing with this mortal enemy.
James is the writer in the New Testament who expands on this topic the most. As the brother of Jesus and the pastor of the first Christian Church in Jerusalem, I’m sure he had ample opportunity to see the deadly impact of the tongue unleashed. He saw His brother crucified based on false testimony. He saw Saul and others persecute the church and drive many away based on half-truths about Jesus and their movement. But the most dangerous and destructive outcomes were when those in the church were using their tongues against each other. It is to believers that he writes in chapter 3:
- “The tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body.”
- “It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.”
- “It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison.”
- “Sometimes it praises our Lord and Father, and sometimes it curses those who have been made in the image of God. And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right!”
Another translation takes this last phrase and simply says, “my brothers, this must not be!” Strong words all around. In fact, if you read through the entire New Testament, it is difficult to find many warnings stronger than these. That little piece of flesh in your mouth is dangerous, my friends. You have been warned.
The book of Proverbs is full of comments about our words, usually contrasting the good with the bad. These sayings, written by the wisest man to ever live, emphasize the use of the tongue. Here are just a few from Proverbs 16:
- “A troublemaker plants seeds of strife;
gossip separates the best of friends.” - “Scoundrels create trouble;
their words are a destructive blaze.” - “Kind words are like honey—
sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.” - “From a wise mind comes wise speech;
the words of the wise are persuasive.” - The wise are known for their understanding,
and pleasant words are persuasive.”
We see the contrast. Wise and kind words have a powerful positive impact, but gossip separates friends and the words of scoundrels are destructive. The funny thing in all of this is very few people set out to be a scoundrel or a gossip. There are some truly rotten people who live for that sort of thing, but I doubt you know many of them and you probably aren’t choosing to hang out with those people.
Instead, the danger comes from those closest to us. Our friends and family. Our brothers and sisters in Christ. They have the most power to spread destruction in our lives. They are the ones undermining their pastors and splitting our churches. The truth is, sometimes the person stirring things up and causing problems is the same one you saw when you were brushing your teeth that morning.
We are all sinful. We are all frail creatures of dust. It is to us that James wrote the words above. You have been warned. Your tongue is dangerous. It can corrupt your entire body and destroy your relationships. Not only that, we can often justify it. Our hearts are deceitful and it is entirely possible that we can trick ourselves into believing that we’re in the right, even as we act to destroy the unity that we are commanded to pursue.
These verses are a challenge to all of us. We can’t assume we aren’t above using our tongues for the annihilation of Christian unity. Beware, Christian! Don’t assume you’re better than that. In almost forty years of Christian life and ministry, I can assure you that you aren’t. Take time to check yourself. Seek the Lord daily. “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” If you want to avoid falling into these dangerous paths, heed Paul’s great request that he begged the church in Ephesus to follow in Ephesians 4:1-3:
Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.
Seeing God 